Tag Archives: transformation

Life Goes On

Reading through old poems and this one gript my heart anew.
It still amazes me that I hated my own writing for years and wouldn’t dare put pen to paper because of what leaked out. Now, I enjoy my own poems so much that sharing them is a pleasure. Though, this isn’t one of my best poems, still, the pleasure in sharing without fear of what others think is lovely. Time changes so much.

It’s Spring and life goes on.

Hooting owl seeking mate’s solace.
Cooing doves with heads touched.
Airplanes dipping low overhead.
Distant traffic sounds whoosh closer then pass.
Pool glimmering blue in morning sun.
Neighbor’s dog pacing at my door for attention.
Ceiling fan teases the air with cool breeze.
Hummingbirds dance around my head as I type.
Butterflies flutter dance on lantana and violas.

Moon watches pale in sky
while Sun burns higher and high.
Earth beams grounding tracks
while Sky descends to ground and back.

Heart’s muted cries see through teary waves
as Eyes leak in sorrow haze.
Breath moves in unseen breeze.
Womb pulses more joyously.

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Anais Nin Lifts Me Once Again

It has been a season of quiet for me, in writing and in real life. Other than work with my dear clients and experimenting with watercolors again, life is purposely quiet. Oh, and of course I’ve continued work-related activities to expand my financial horizons. An orgasmic goddess must eat after all. And I’m burning to travel which means the coffers must increase.

My soul needs this sabbatical of spacious personal awareness. My soul is adjusting, healing, transmuting and becoming more in alignment with my entire being. Sabbaticals are full of restorative magic.

Whilst pondering many things, I’ve wondered how to express my submissive self. My inner core increases in strength and I’ve wondered if I were actually a sub anymore? Or maybe that I didn’t ‘need’ it anymore? But that doesn’t feel right. I still crave the delicious allure of a Dominant man and the safe harbor offered my submissive heart. I love serving, pleasing, and bringing pleasure to a Dom. I love watching his Dominance flourish and expand his heart, mind, soul and entire being.

But I’m growing in STRENGTH and VOICE and sheer FORCE of NATURE and CREATIVE JUICINESS. Thus my doubts, ponderings upon whether or not I’d entered the zone of ‘too much’ for any Dominant man to want to engage with me.

My ponderings led me back to Anais Nin. Ah, the soul-soothing words of a fellow Dominance-desiring woman. How could I doubt my true nature?

I do not want to be the leader. I refuse to be the leader. I want to live darkly and richly in my femaleness. I want a man lying over me, always over me. His will, his pleasure, his desire, his life, his work, his sexuality the touchstone, the command, my pivot. I don’t mind working, holding my ground intellectually, artistically; but as a woman, oh, God, as a woman I want to be dominated. I don’t mind being told to stand on my own feet, not to cling, be all that I am capable of doing, but I am going to be pursued, fucked, possessed by the will of a male at his time, his bidding.
–Anais Nin

Capture The Wind’s Laugh

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Listen. Shhh.

The waterfalls are singing their songs.
Earth and sky dance throughout days and nights.
Twirling all around us, life springs forth from
every corner.

Your sighs capture the wind’s laugh.
Your tears hold treasures from ocean depths.
Your touch heals the nations.

Fill me up with your splendor.
Carve your glory into me.
Dance ’round the misty meadows of memory.
Loosen the loving truth buried under scars.

Strength upon strength decorates the dark.
Shadows entwine with light making rainbows.

Transformation comes in the softness of dawn,
in the twilight of desperation,
and the quiet of peace chosen.

Deceit’s Surprise

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My soul pouts for attention
while my spirit soars higher.

Taste day’s labor in light.
Savor night’s labor in shadow.

Pain surges up from heart to throat
and strangles in pinhole space.

Pictures spill out soul and spirit
in dark hues and bright dimmed.

His touch carved into me,
chiseled into me,
as ebony on alabaster.

Indelible marks of substance,
depth of imprint wise melted
with deceit’s surprise.